


that one time khadgar called lothar "master" in front of everybody

by lettersforsale



Category: Warcraft (2016), World of Warcraft
Genre: And Khadgar needs some love, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Lothar is as oblivious as a doorknob, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Smut, Spanking, Touch-Starved Khadgar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-23 19:49:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15613740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lettersforsale/pseuds/lettersforsale
Summary: Lothar jokingly tells Khadgar to call him 'Master' and Khadgar does - not just in private but in public, too. Misunderstandings follow.





	1. Chapter 1

"... yes, and Lo- I mean... Master, if you could-" Almost immediately Khadgar is interrupted and doesn't know if he should be grateful for that or not.

“Excuse you?” Lothar stares at him, meaningful, and raises an eyebrow. Oh… He really wants Khadgar to do this, he really wants to humiliate him here, in front of everybody, and yes, Khadgar know that he could just disobey him but… he needs to be good.

“Master?”, he whispers, heat flushing his skin.

“What did you say?” Lothar’s smile looks odd, almost forced and when Khadgar repeats the word, he can’t bring himself to look at Lothar, just kind of fixes his gaze onto the table. 

“Master?” In the background somebody groans. The room is quiet.

“Let’s… have a chat, shall we?! In private.” Lothar grabs him by the arm and pulls him outside while Khadgar stumbles with him, too nervous to say something, his mind desperately searching for the perfect apology. Lothar closes the door and leans against it. He’s still smiling but Khadgar can’t quite ignore the feeling that he fucked something up.

“What was that?”, Lothar wants to know.

“I… um- you… you said?” It’s pathetic, Khadgar knows that. Is Lothar mad? He probably is. Of course he is.

“Don’t do it again, yes? Unless you want to end up over my knee”, says Lothar and actually winks. Without any doubt, Khadgar has fucked up. Just… he doesn’t know what exactly. And he can’t ask, can he, because then Lothar would be even more pissed and frankly, Khadgar doesn’t want Lothar to hit him. Lothar is strong. Lothar could hurt him.

“N-no, of course not”, Khadgar replies instead. “I’ll stop…”

They walk back into the room where everybody is busy not to look at them. Khadgar can feel the tips of his ears burning but the meeting continues like nothing happened.

Khadgar doesn’t listen to the determined orders of the attending kings and queens, the concerns of their advisors – he can’t get Lothar’s threat out of his head. So he replays everything that he said and did, analyses every word and every sentence; he needs a clue, there has to be _something_. Was he disrespectful? But he tries so hard, Lothar must know that, right? Or… maybe it isn’t enough? What else is he supposed to do? Khadgar remembers Lothar’s wishes from other nights that they had spent together: Addressing him as ‘Master’. No touching unless Lothar wants him to. Kneeling. No… No, he can’t do that, he _can’t_. This is an official meeting after all, they’re not alone, no no no. No. Please.

Khadgar risks a glance at Lothar who’s standing next to him but he doesn’t show any reaction. Is that what he wants? What if he gets it wrong? He- Lothar would be so angry; he would surely punish him. On the other hand… Maybe that’s why he’s pissed. Because Khadgar belongs to him, Lothar always says so, but Khadgar doesn’t act like it when he should. Yes, Khadgar blinks rapidly, that must be it. It’s such a simple solution that he almost hates himself for not thinking of it in the first place. He knows that he should be better at reading the signs, and at submitting, since he wants Lothar to stay and nobody stays with an unobservant, disobedient partner. Sometimes he still fucks it up but usually he knows what he did wrong.

Feathery relief replaces the gnawing worry in Khadgar’s gut – everything will be fine, he will fix it, Lothar won’t leave him. No punishment. He slightly turns his head, searches for Lothar’s eyes and is glad when Lothar smiles reassuringly. Yes, this time Khadgar will get it right. As gracefully as he can manage he sinks to his knees and is pulled up by a hand on the back of his shirt before he can even hit the ground. “Oh-“

Lothar’s right hand wraps around his waist to keep him up. “Don’t do anything stupid”, he murmurs and it takes a few seconds until Khadgar realises that Lothar doesn’t want him kneeling next to him and that he fucked up, _again_ , and that Lothar isn’t smiling anymore. One of the advisors eyes them suspiciously. “What’s wrong with him?”, he asks and Khadgar knows that he means him.

“He’s not feeling good”, Lothar explains. “Really, nothing to worry about.” Khadgar sees Taria roll her eyes and focus on her wine. Icy dread pools in his stomach. In reality, he knows, and he knows that Lothar knows, that there is a lot wrong with him. Apparently he can’t figure out what Lothar _wants_ and that makes him bad, and he deserves it, Khadgar definitely deserves the pain and Lothar hurting him. “Forgive me”, he says hoarsely. Lothar nods. “Later”, he answers and pats Khadgars hip.

Taria clears her throat. “How about you get him into bed and make sure he gets some rest? And some sleep, Lothar? Khadgar looks a bit… sick.” And _oh_ , Khadgar is so grateful, because that means he won’t have to wait and they can get it over with. “That’s a great idea”, Lothar agrees, already steering Khadgar out of the room and never letting go of his waist. He’s quiet until they reach Lothar’s room and Khadgar doesn’t dare to say a word. To be honest, there is nothing he can do to get himself out of this situation but a small part of him hopes that this won’t be the end. Maybe Lothar will give him another chance, if Khadgar begs for it. He’s a quick learner, perhaps Lothar noticed that.

In contrast, Lothar seems a lot more relaxed. “We have to send Taria flowers”, he states, lets himself fall onto the bed and pulls Khadgar down with him. “Like, a bouquet, something big. She basically saved your ass.” Lothar gently tugs at his hair. “What were you thinking?!”

“I don’t know.” Is this the part where he apologizes or should he wait for Lothar’s permission to defend himself?

“You don’t know?! You called me ‘Master’ in front of all these people. Khadgar. Seriously.” Lothar shakes his head like he can’t believe Khadgar’s behaviour.

“I’m sorry”, Khadgar says and it sounds as miserable as he feels. His hand is clenching Lothar’s shirt, wants to touch him so badly since it’s the only comfort that Khadgar can get.

“I should really spank you”, Lothar considers. There is a burning lump in Khadgar’s throat and hot tears are gathering in his eyes. He deserves it. He was bad. “Naughty little spell chucker.”

“I’m sorry”, he whispers again and buries his face in Lothar’s chest and counts the seconds until Lothar will shove him away. He gets to three when Lothar starts rubbing his back. “Are you crying? Don’t cry? I’m not mad. I’m not mad, I promise.” Khadgar never wants to move again; he feels the shame in every inch of his body.

“Do you think I’m angry?”, Lothar continues. “I’m not, everything’s fine. Hey, no crying. Please, stop... Oh…” He pets Khadgar’s hair and it’s so nice that Khadgar nearly forgets why they’re here. Lothar is surprisingly bad at punishing people.

“Am I?” Khadgar lifts his head and prays that he didn’t say it out aloud. “I won’t do it again”, he promises because he can’t let Lothar leave, he needs him and he needs his comfort _so much_.

“Do you think this is punishment?”, Lothar wants to know. Khadgar shakes his head no. This feels too nice and Lothar is too careful. But there will be punishment, he knows it. He accepts it though, it only makes sense. If Lothar demands it, Khadgar will submit to it and then Lothar can stay and everything will be good again. It’s a plan.

 ---

Lothar doesn’t know what to do. He had been flirting, had been his usual charming self when he teased Khadgar during the meeting and now… something is wrong. “Don’t cry”, he tries to soothe the obviously crying mage in his bed, and pets his hair. Lothar had never been good at calming people down. Is it something he said, something he did? Lothar feels like a monster. Khadgar mumbles something about punishment and Lothar can’t follow him. “You know I’m not angry, right? It’s fine… Just… Can you please stop doing that?!” Crying people are awful, he decides, and they don’t listen.

Khadgar looks up, teary-eyed and pale. “Don’t leave”, he pleads.

“I won’t”, Lothar confirms which is ridiculous, because Khadgar isn’t exactly tiny and Lothar can’t move anyway with Khadgar clinging to him. He rubs Khadgar’s back again. “I’m not leaving”, he tells the ceiling and wishes for Taria to be here. She would know what to do. “Please stop crying…”

Eventually, Khadgar does. Slowly and interrupted by soft whimpers, but he does. “I’ll do everything you want”, he vows and while Lothar is a bit overwhelmed with the situation he still likes the cuddling part of it. “Uh, yes. Everything?” Khadgar nods solemnly.

“And… you will stay?”

Hopefully, this will settle everything, even though Lothar has no idea what initially caused Khadgar’s reaction. Maybe it’s the stress, he has a lot to do. Maybe he’s sick indeed and caught some magical illness and needs rest and some comfort. Either way, Lothar has no problem with continuing this. “Yeah, I’ll stay. And you’ll be a good little mage for me.” Khadgar nods again. Well, this isn’t so bad. Lothar congratulates himself on solving this problem and getting Khadgar into bed with him at the same time. He kisses Khadgar’s temple and massages his neck and Khadgar sighs and closes his eyes. Just the stress, he’s exhausted. Nothing to worry about, he will be fine. Hopefully…


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lothar thinks that orgasms fix everything. Khadgar doesn't agree.

A short while later Khadgar falls asleep. His breathing slows down and Lothar feels his muscles relax. He stays, because there’s nothing else he can do. Khadgar is a warm weight against him; Lothar could never leave, not when he trusts him like that. In a way it’s almost… cute but Lothar tries his best to appear unbothered when Taria finally rushes in.

“He’s asleep”, she notes when she closes the door and sits on the edge of the bed. Lothar lazily plays around with strands of Khadgars hair, still rubbing his back every now and then. It’s nice, to give something instead of taking.

“He was tired”, he says and then they both stare at the sleeping mage in Lothar’s bed who looks too innocent for the power that’s slumbering inside of him. Khadgar’s tears have dried on his cheeks but Taria notices them anyway. “What happened?” Her voice is cunning, strict even; Lothar can’t lie to her, they both know it. Not that he would want to.

“I don’t know”, he admits and it’s the ugly truth that he would rather ignore. He knows Khadgar, knows where to look when he hides with a book (or several), he knows what kind of food he likes and how to get Khadgar to eat when he forgets it in his fascinated excitement. And Lothar knows about his past – or at least a few bits and pieces that form a confusing puzzle. But humans are complicate and mages are even worse, so it feels like everything he knows is not enough. It doesn’t matter though. Khadgar seems healthy and happy most of the time so they shouldn’t think about old memories and the pain they bring with them. At least, for Lothar, it’s not worth it, no need to stir anything up, thank you very much.

“But he has a lot of work, you know, maybe that’s the reason”, he offers some kind of explanation to Taria who doesn’t look convinced. “Maybe it’s nightmares?”

“Maybe it is. Maybe it’s not.” They can’t be sure. Lothar doesn’t want to ask Khadgar about it, since talking about feelings aren’t one of his strengths and Khadgar is alive so it can’t be that bad.

“You have to ask, Anduin.” Taria says it like it’s urgent, one of the things on her ever growing lists of concerns.

“He’s fine”, Lothar insists. He’ll cuddle with Khadgar every day if that means that they won’t have to talk about Khadgar’s… problems. Or about him crying. Or about him calling Lothar ‘Master’ and not knowing where to draw the line. Actually, a little punishment seems quite appropriate for that one…

“You’ll fix it”, Taria demands and Lothar nods. He’ll fix it… somehow. Why not have some fun while doing that though?! Khadgar can take some more teasing…

 

When Khadgar wakes up it’s dark outside. “How long did I sleep?”, he asks, voice rough and hair completely messed up from Lothar’s care.

Lothar shrugs. “Few hours? You were pretty…” He searches for the right word but Khadgar agrees anyway.

“Yes, right, I was. Sorry, I- it won’t happen again. I will be good now.”

“Well, that’s nice to hear.” Lothar grins and cups his face, kisses the tip of Khadgar’s nose, his cheeks, and finally his lips. He’s careful, just like Taria wanted, and also because there’s no fun in mocking a scared sleepy kid. First, Khadgar has to let his guard down.

“You will be good for me, yes?”, he asks, so Khadgar can feel safe, and indeed he is quick to assure him.

“Yes, yes, absolutely. Always. Always, I promise. No more… accidents.” Khadgar blushes and Lothar can’t help but laugh: It’s too endearing how eager he is. He will play with Khadgar, he’ll make him forget his worries.

“Good. That’s good.” Lothar kisses Khadgar again and tilts his chin up, a mischievous gleam in his eyes. “But I feel like you have to make up for your sins. For the things you did wrong…”, he philosophizes. Khadgar blinks anxiously and licks his lips. It’s pure entertainment, in Lothar’s eyes. It’s too good to stop now.

“I’ve thought of a few rules”, he informs Khadgar kindly. “First rule…” He pushes Khadgar off him and up on his knees and tugs at his shirt. “No clothes. Not while you’re in this room, no matter who’s here.”

Of course, Khadgar argues. “What if-“

“No.” It’s one word and he’s silent. Lothar has to admit that his devotion is impressive. “Good boy”, he praises. No one can say that he’s not a generous and loving partner. “Undress”, he orders.

Khadgar sits up and does so without protest. It’s not easy for him, Lothar can sense his inner struggle, but it’s incredibly satisfying for him to watch Khadgar submit; he’s just so _beautiful_. Soft skin and dark eyes and desperately wanting to please – Lothar loves it. “Good boy…”, he murmurs again, and when Khadgar shivers, Lothar likes to think it’s because of his praise. Eventually he is naked and kneels on a pile of clothing on his bed, gaze fixed somewhere on Lothar’s chest.

“Look at me.”

 ---

Khadgar obeys, he has no choice, does he? Lothar lets his eyes wander down Khadgar’s body and Khadgar hates it. He’s vulnerable and he feels weak but he can’t complain when he wants Lothar to stay, so he kneels on the bed and fights the urge to cover his body. This isn’t the first time that Lothar sees him naked, they’re both aware of that, but Lothar’s gaze is intense and _hot_ and Khadgar is uncomfortable. His fingers claps the fabric of the sheets around him. He has to be good, has to make Lothar happy, has to be good… It’s so awful that he wants to cry again but Lothar has made it clear that he doesn’t like tears and Khadgar assumes that he won’t be lenient anymore when Khadgar can’t control himself. So, no crying.

“You’re also not allowed to leave this room”, Lothar says and kisses him sweetly. Khadgar melts against his touch. He won’t leave this room. “For the next couple of days, I think. No need to repeat the situation we were in today. You’re just going to stay here and think about how bad you were.” Lothar emphasizes the last few words with kisses to Khadgar’s neck. “Such a bad little mage… What am I going to do with you?”

“Whatever you want”, Khadgar whispers. It’s a promise, it’s a vow, it’s everything that he can give. Everything for Lothar…

A new thought enters his mind: it’s not just for Lothar, it’s for himself, too, because he needs Lothar and he wants him. Khadgar’s desires include selfishness, an ugly trait which he’s not proud of. The realisation is a sharp stab to his heart.

“I might put a collar on you.” Lothar tilts his head and strokes Khadgars nipples.

“Yes…” Lothar pinches his right nipple and Khadgar gasps for breath through the pain, and the shame curling in his belly. He is bad. He fucked up.

“Yes what?”, Lothar wants to know. Right. This is the lesson that Khadgar is supposed to learn.

“Yes, Master”, he says, closes his eyes when he feels Lothar’s mouth, his _tongue_ on his exposed skin. Khadgar’s cock is hard and he hates Lothar, no, he loves Lothar and hates himself, he just wants to be good, please… Tears stream down his cheeks when Lothar touches him, and when later Khadgar comes. A few moments later he kneels on Lothar’s bed, ruefully and shaking, biting his lip so he won’t sob. He’s bad. He’s bad. He doesn’t deserve nice things, not when Lothar is angry. Lothar leans back and looks at him. He smiles.

“You’re beautiful”, he says. Khadgar can’t believe him. He’s naked and there’s cum on his thighs and stomach, and he wants a hug more than anything else right now. And he wants Lothar to be proud of him, but his punishment has just begun and there will be no comfort. Maybe if he shows Lothar that he’s worthy during the next couple of days, maybe then he can request it. If he phrases it cautiously. If Lothar is in a good mood.

Lothar pulls him closer, kisses Khadgar’s lips and it’s nice even though Khadgar isn’t stupid. Lothar is still mad at him and he only gets up and wipes Khadgar’s legs and stomach with a wet cloth because he doesn’t want him to mess up Lothar’s bed. No affection, only practical reasons.

“Now, I’m actually tired”, Lothar announces, dumping all of Khadgar’s clothes onto a nearby chair. Dutifully, Khadgar slides off the bed. “Do you want me to sleep on the floor?”, he asks. His heart bleeds. Lothar laughs.

“Tempting but no. Who will keep me warm when you sleep on the floor?” Khadgar doesn’t answer, it’s not his place. Instead he watches Lothar crawl into under the blankets.

“Mage…” Lothar sounds impatient. “Don’t make me wait. Lay down.” On… the floor? Or the bed? Khadgar can’t decide which one Lothar means and he doesn’t dare to hope that he’ll sleep with Lothar this night. So he stands there until Lothar grabs his wrist and pulls him onto the bed, and then Khadgar gingerly curls up on his side so he doesn’t touch Lothar. It’s a fitting punishment, he thinks. He needs to earn Lothar’s love before he’s allowed to show it to everyone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taria sees more than she wants to.

The first thing Khadgar notices, when he wakes up again, is that he’s warm. There’s a blanket wrapped around him and he’s kind of wrapped around Lothar who has his arms around him and snores into his neck. It’s nice, it’s cosy. Bright morning light falls into the room. Everything looks soft and Lothar hugs him in his sleep and Khadgar has never been happier and has never been this afraid. This is what he could lose. If he’s not enough, then nights like this will never happen again, he will be alone, he will have nightmares… Khadgar can’t let that happen. It’s Lothar who’s initiating the touch so Khadgar feels alright with accepting it, even though a voice in his head reminds him of his still ongoing punishment. But he can do this, of course he can, there have been battles with far more pain. Not losing Lothar is worth everything.

“What are you thinking about?”, Lothar whispers into his ear and Khadgar flinches.

“You”, he answers without hesitation. Lothar’s grey eyes stare into his own. A small smile is on his lips.

“Really?”

“Mh, yes. You snore”, Khadgar informs him. “Woke me up.” Lothar lets his hands slide from where they rested on Khadgar’s back to Khadgar’s ass, cups one of his cheeks and laughs. “Am I supposed to believe that?!”

“Yes?” It’s not an actual answer since Khadgar’s opinion on it doesn’t matter, but thankfully Lothar doesn’t seem too pissed about Khadgar’s impudence.

“Poor little mage. Didn’t get enough sleep because he was too busy cuddling me.”

“Do you want me to leave?”, Khadgar asks earnestly, hoping that Lothar is tolerant this morning.

“Hmm, no. Why would I? Let’s have some fun first.”

“Yes.” Relieved, Khadgar lets his head sink onto Lothar’s shoulder. His touch is addictive, his praise too wonderful to not be made up of lies.

“I think that ass of yours still needs to be reddened”, Lothar says. He kisses Khadgar on his lips. “Yes?”

“Yes”, Khadgar agrees because it’s such a small price to pay, it almost seems ridiculous to him. Surely he can deal with a sore ass when he can keep Lothar in his life.

“Do you want to get over my knee?”, Lothar asks and Khadgar wiggles out of his embrace and waits until Lothar sat up against the headboard. His thighs are hard under Khadgar’s hips and with him being naked and Lothar fully clothed the position feels awkward but this isn’t about Khadgar being comfortable. He’ll manage.

“Do you want a pillow?”

The question catches Khadgar off guard. “Mh? Oh, yeah, no, it’s fine. But thank you.” It’s so considerate, so nice that it makes his heart ache and Khadgar knows exactly why he’s doing this. He’s not stupid: Lothar is strong and this will hurt like hell but it also means that there’s a chance of comfort and some kind words thrown in between. Khadgar arches his back, presents his ass to Lothar and grips the blankets under him tightly. “I’m ready”, he says.

Lothar pats his ass. “You know”, he says, “This is a very nice view. I could get used to it.”

Khadgar doesn’t know how to respond to that. “Uh… yes. Sure?” It makes Lothar laugh again.

“We should do this more often.” Lothar strokes his thighs, his ass, leans down to nips at one of his cheeks. Khadgar isn’t necessarily an impatient man but the waiting nearly drives him insane. He’s glad that they’re alone though, because something tells him that Lothar isn’t opposed to punishing publically if he has to.

The first swat is nothing, Khadgar barely feels it. The second is the same and by the time they reach ten, Khadgar can’t stand it anymore. “Could you just”- he stops himself just in time. Lothar pauses.

“What is it? Do you want it harder?”

“I…” The truth is that Khadgar just wants to get it over with. “Yes. Harder. Please.” His face feels hot; begging for his own punishment is a new kind of humiliation. Lothar is inventive.

“Who would’ve thought that...” Lothar chuckles. The next slap is definitely more painful but Khadgar knows that Lothar is holding back. “Harder”, he says quietly into the silence of their room, stares at the floor and curls his fists around the blankets. And, _oh_ , the next few swats are pure fire, scorching hot on his skin, cracks of sound breaking the air. Khadgar moans and whimpers, closes his eyes and buries his face into the mattress. It hurts _so badly_. Lothar holds him down and continues with a light voice and forceful blows to Khadgar’s ass. “You’re doing good, stop moving around so much. And put your feet down, don’t want you to kick me.”

“Sorry”!”, Khadgar rasps. He curls his toes and it takes all of his willpower to stay in position but Lothar’s praise helps so he reduces his reactions to small whimpers at each slap and focuses on staying still. Lothar, on the other hand, seems to actually enjoy this.

“It’s good, yeah?”, he asks Khadgar, seemingly amused and it makes Khadgar feels so weak. This is just his hand, he should be able to take it. Who knows what Lothar would do to him when he is truly angry… ? But Khadgar can’t say that, relies on Lothar’s mercy instead.

“Please”, he begs, no pride left. “Please…” Lothar delivers one last hard smack. “Do you want me to stop?” Khadgar nods, gasping for air and going limp over Lothar’s knees. Finally… It is over, it is over.

“Shh, you did good, it’s fine.” Lothar’s praise is the only thing preventing him from crying. Now his fingers are gentle on Khadgar’s abused skin, caressing where he marked his ass and it’s such a stark contrast to the pain that it takes Khadgar a moment to even register Lothar’s touch.

“Thank you… Thank you”, he stutters. It takes a few moments to for him become aware of his surroundings again. He blinks away the prickling tears in his eyes and turns his head to look at Lothar – and his ass, which is red and sore. Sitting down won’t be pleasant for the next few days… Lothar seems happy though. “It’s a good look on you”, he comments. “Pretty.” Khadgar only manages a wary nod. “If you say so…”

“I do. Definitely.” They stay in this position for a bit longer, Khadgar still over Lothar’s knees because he doesn’t want to move and because he likes Lothar rubbing some of the pain away and muttering words of praise under his breath.

 ---

“It wasn’t too much, right?”, Lothar asks because the kid looks completely worn out from the couple of swats that he gave him. Did he underestimate his own strength? He doesn’t know if he should be concerned or not but, then again, Khadgar had cried when he had gotten him off yesterday. And damn, Lothar knows what he’s doing in bed but his partners aren’t usually this… emotional. Khadgar really is special.

The mage shakes his head. “N-no, it’s fine. Thank you.” God, he even thanks him – it’s adorable.

“Yeah? You’re alright?” Khadgar nods and Lothar reaches forward and ruffles his hair. “So how about you stay in bed and I get us some breakfast?”

“Sounds good.” Khadgar doesn’t move. Lothar slaps his ass slightly and Khadgar yelps.

“Come on, up. I won’t carry you with me.” Immediately Khadgar squirms off his lap and curls up on his side, facing Lothar. He’s still naked but unlike before he doesn’t seem to mind anymore. Lothar bends down and kisses his forehead before he gets up to find his shoes. “Be a good boy while I find some food.”

 ---

Lothar has been gone for a few minutes and Khadgar already misses him. He’s curled up on the bed, doesn’t want to touch his ass but is also distracted by the pain so that it’s hard to form clear thoughts. Lothar was pleased when hurting him, he _liked_ it, and Khadgar doesn’t know what to make of that discovery… A knock at the door interrupts his thinking. Is it- it can’t be Lothar, he would never knock, not at his own room, let alone other people’s doors. So… Shit. That’s… What is he supposed to do? Khadgar bites his lips, suddenly very alert. It has to be a test. Lothar is sending someone to see if Khadgar follows his rules; it’s probably one of his soldiers or some servant that he will never see again. Still, it’s embarrassing to be seen like this and Khadgar hesitates a second before giving in.

“Come in”, he calls, no stranger to degrading himself after Lothar’s lessons. He wants to die when Taria opens the door - out of all the possibilities, this one hadn’t even crossed his mind.

“Is Lothar- oh! Oh. Um… Is Lothar here?” She pointedly avoids looking at his naked body and stares at the windows instead but that doesn’t make it better: It’s obvious that she can see everything.

“I-“ Khadgar opens his mouth and closes it again, mortification hitting him like a gryphon in full flight. His neck feels hot and he can’t move, just stare at the blankets that could be his rescue – if he ignores Lothar’s orders and disobeys him again. He can’t. He can’t… “He’s- he’s not…”

“He’s not here”, Taria finishes the sentence for him. Khadgar still can’t meet her eyes. “Yes, right. I’ll just come back… later.”

“Y-yes, Mylady.” He waits until she closed the door behind her, then pulls the blankets over his head with shaking hands. There goes any plan to be respected by the queen – as a mage, as a person, as anything ever. Lothar is cruel, and Khadgar deserves it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kind of feel bad for making Khadgar suffer. Sorry.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solving problems is hard.

Lothar comes back to Khadgar hiding under a bunch of blankets and he feels like he missed something. Or maybe he did something but that’s not a good thing either.

“Khadgar?”, he asks, putting the tray with some bread and fruit on the table. “Hey, are you alright?” There is no answer, and really, this is ruining Lothar’s morning, he thought they had left the tears and crying behind. He hates having to deal with emotional mages, this isn’t what he wants out of this relationship. Defeated, he sighs and walks over to the bed.

“Hey.” Lothar pokes the lump under the blankets right where Khadgar’s shoulder should be. “Talk to me. Don’t… be dead or something.”

“I’m not dead.” Well, at least there’s that. But something must have happened to make Khadgar act this… weird.

“That’s good”, Lothar says. “I’m glad you’re still alive.” He’s probably not very reassuring so he tries to pull the blankets away instead. Underneath, Khadgar is still curled up, his eyes tightly shut, biting his lip. He’s also naked and his ass looks red and sore but Lothar feels like this is not the time to get him off again, as tempting as it is.

“What happened?”, he wants to know and hopes that he sounds trustworthy. Why the fuck does Khadgar have so many problems anyway?! Lothar has to find him more friends, friends who aren’t him so that Khadgar has someone he can talk to.

“Taria was here”, Khadgar replies gravely. “She… she saw.”

Ah. That doesn’t explain anything. “Uh, yeah. She saw… what exactly?” Solving people’s problems is hard, Lothar realises. He likes Khadgar and everything but if he had never met him, then his life would be a lot easier.

“She saw me.” Khadgar looks so ashamed that Lothar can’t help but laugh. It’s cute, it is.

“She knows what you look like, Khadgar. Don’t be so dramatic.” Lothar pulls him into a hug. Touching Khadgar has worked before, maybe it will work now.

“You told her?!” Apparently, it doesn’t work because Khadgar seems even more upset than before.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about”, Lothar admits and kisses him. There is no way that Khadgar can talk when being kissed so this is a perfect solution to this whole mess, except it isn’t. Lothar tastes salt and indeed, there are tears in Khadgar’s eyes. “Don’t cry”, Lothar pleads. “Oh, please don’t do that.”

“I’m sorry…”

\---

Khadgar tries to get his tears under control. Lothar looks completely lost and that means he could hurt Khadgar again because he’s so much trouble and he needs to be quiet. But… it’s just too much. Khadgar understands why he’s being punished, it’s reasonable, but Lothar telling Taria every little detail about it… He wasn’t that bad. He’s not stupid, he knows what he did wrong. A spanking, a whipping would have sufficed, Lothar doesn’t have to humiliate him like that. Or… does he? Is Khadgar this awful?

“I won’t do it again”, Khadgar says softly. “Please stop punishing me, I learned my lesson, I promise. I won’t do it again.”

“Yeah?”

Khadgar nods. It’s not over yet but maybe it will get better. Lothar is still here.

“Then… tell me what you learned. Slowly.”

Luckily, Khadgar knows what to say; he had a lot of time to think about his words and how to apologize properly for his actions. He _wants_ to be forgiven.

“I won’t show any affection to you in public. I won’t touch you without your permission. I won’t address you as ‘Master’ unless you want it. If I do something wrong I won’t try to fix it but ask for punishment instead. And I will follow your rules, no matter what they are. And… and I will be good…” Khadgar risks a glance at Lothar but he doesn’t seem satisfied and furrows his brows instead. It wasn’t enough. Khadgar blinks rapidly, tries to remember what he forgot. “And I’m sorry that Taria had to get involved in my punishment. I’m sure she… had better things to do.”

Lothar looks at him very seriously and it makes Khadgar feel his remorse deep in his bones. “Please forgive me”, he ends his confession. There’s nothing left to say.

“You know”, Lothar tells him. “You’re not my slave. You’re my partner.”

“I know.” Khadgar plays with the collar of Lothar’s shirt. It’s makes it easier to deal with the talking, which is almost worse than the pain because this time Khadgar can’t just lay there and submit, he has to interact with Lothar.

“I don’t want a partner who thinks of himself like that. You shouldn’t- I don’t punish my partner, Khadgar. Fuck, I don’t want to hurt you. Do you understand that? There’s no punishment for my fucking partner.”

“Yes, I…” Khadgar needs to answer him. Lothar doesn’t want- he’s… he shouldn’t… A dull ache spreads to Khadgar’s heart as he registers what _exactly_ Lothar means. He can’t be his partner. He’s not what Lothar wants. But… but there is one last chance to make him stay, even if it’s risky and _insane_ and Khadgar shouldn’t get his hopes up.

“I understand”, he says, forces himself to stay calm. “If our… relationship doesn’t work then maybe I can be your slave instead? Please? I- I just want to be with you-“

“You can’t be my slave”, Lothar interrupts him and Khadgar needs to offer him something, he can’t just let him go.

“I can learn, I will be better. We can try, yes, Anduin? Please? Don’t leave me…” Khadgar knows that he’s powerful and that he could leave and that he could survive without Lothar but Khadgar also has no one to return to. He has no one who actually likes him and now that he knows what it feels like, he doesn’t want Lothar to give him away.

“I said no!” Light, Khadgar has never seen Lothar this furious. “Why didn’t you tell me anything?! I know I’m bad at fixing things but this is… this is… Why didn’t you tell me?!”

“I didn’t want to make it worse”, Khadgar mumbles. He’s trapped, can’t really escape when Lothar decides to hit him. The disappointment over his failure makes him feel sick; he endured all of the pain and humiliation for nothing.

“Khadgar.” Lothar runs his fingers through his hair. “Khadgar. I love you. I won’t leave you, yes?”

No. It seems too easy. “Are you sure?” Of course, Lothar is lying. Khadgar doesn’t know his reasons for it but otherwise nothing makes sense.

“Uh, yes, I’m sure. I’m staying and you’re staying and… I should probably get Taria because she’s better with feelings stuff. But yeah. I’m not leaving you.” It dawns upon Khadgar that they might’ve misunderstood each other.

“Are you staying because I was good and took my punishment well or are there other reasons?” This time, he will make sure to get it right, here won’t be any more mistakes. Khadgar will try harder.

“No, I’m staying because I love you. I never punished you for anything?”

“You hit me.”

“You liked it!”

Khadgar thinks that this is one of the most complex problems he’s ever encountered – and he has no solution for it. What is he supposed to say?

“Why would I like being hit?”

“Well, I… I don’t know. Some people like it. You didn’t enjoy it?”

“No?” It takes Khadgar a moment to process this information: Lothar doesn’t want to hurt him. There was never any punishment. And… there are people who like pain and Lothar thought he was one of them. Khadgar takes a deep breath.

“I don’t like being hit”, he clarifies. Maybe that’s a dealbreaker for Lothar and Khadgar has to try to like it in the future, everything is very confusing.

“Then I won’t do it again”, Lothar promises. “I’m so sorry.” He holds Khadgar close, for whatever reason, and Khadgar doesn’t object, is busy organizing his muddled thoughts. But Lothar stays, and that’s what’s important. After a while he simply has to ask, though, because he needs to know Lothar’s final decision. “Are you mad at me?”

“No, not at you.” Lothar sighs. That doesn’t help.

“Then… where’s the problem? You will stay, right?”

“I will stay, don’t worry, spell chucker.” Half-heartedly, Lothar smiles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be another chapter so stay tuned for that! Also I have so many plot ideas for other fics right now and they all involve Khadgar (and Lothar) suffering. Hm.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feelings, Taria and rules.

So he fucked up. Royally. It bothers Lothar, not just because he was insensitive and didn’t pay enough attention but because it was Khadgar who got hurt – who got hurt by _him_. And damn it, that was never supposed to happen. It doesn’t help that every single one of Khadgar’s explanations sound bizarre to Lothar; why would he take him as a slave of all things? Why would he leave him anyway?! At least Lothar figured out that Khadgar doesn’t like pain and, yes, he can fix this, he’s not completely useless, he can find some salve for that, a physical solution to a physical problem. But not right now. Right now Khadgar has vanished after Lothar quietly told him to get dressed and to fulfil his magical duties. He needed some time to think. If possible, alone. Breakfast is long forgotten, there are more important things that he has to make right.

Eventually, he goes to Taria for advice even though Khadgar will hate him for that. On the other hand she is somebody who isn’t involved in their relationship and should offer a different perspective on things, which is what Lothar is looking for.

Taria doesn’t look up from her reading when he enters the room, just merely raises an eyebrow. “Did you fix it?”, she asks.

Lothar leans against the wall, glares at the floor. “Not really. Kind of made it worse.” It’s hard to say, to acknowledge his mistakes. There is no denial anymore. Taria doesn’t seem surprised.

“And did you realise that after or before you beat him?”

“I didn’t beat him, Taria.” She glares at him and if anyone deserves punishment it’s probably Lothar.

“He didn’t look too happy”, she comments and Lothar notices that she’s upset too. Of course she would protect Khadgar. Ever since Lothar had brought him back and had kissed him in front of her, she thought of him as part of the family, Lothar knows that. It’s absurd to think of Khadgar being… scared of her. Or of Lothar.

“What do I do?”, Lothar wants to know. “He has these stupid theories that I will leave him when he’s… bad. And I don’t even know what that means in his eyes because he also thinks that I have rules for him. And… well, I don’t remember creating them. So what do I do?”

\---

Lothar had sent him away. It doesn’t shock Khadgar like it should since he feels mostly numb. It won’t be forever though, just maybe for a few days or a couple of weeks or maybe even more, Lothar hadn’t specified the amount of time, which makes it harder to determine when Khadgar is allowed to return.

“But I can come back?”, Khadgar had asked after he’d gotten dressed, standing in the middle of the room, alone, the fabric of his pants rubbing against sore skin.

“Yeah, of course. Later, yes? Later”, Lothar had answered. Unfortunately, “later” could mean a lot. But Khadgar will figure it out, it’s a goal worth working for. And if Lothar had meant months indeed… well, Khadgar will learn to be better during that time. It’s not completely lost, their relationship or whatever Khadgar is to Lothar, and Khadgar is very grateful for that. Lothar has given him another chance.

He hurries through the corridors and hallways; right now there’s a lot to do, a lot to catch up on. A lot to distract Khadgar from his desire for comfort and Lothar and quiet nights in his bed. Somehow he doubts that there’ll ever be enough work for him to forget that.

\---

Lothar finds Khadgar in the library, much later, when the sun has already set and the sky is full of stars and heavy darkness. Khadgar is on the floor, hunched over at least ten books, scribbled notes scattered around him, and he flinches when Lothar sits down in front of him, careful not to disturb anything in Khadgar’s literary mess.

“Hello”, Lothar greets him. Khadgar stares at him for a second, his dark eyes wide in the flickering light of the candle on the floor next to him.

“Hello”, he replies and doesn’t seem thrilled about Lothar being here. Lothar understands.

“I can come back later”, he offers. “If you’re in the middle of something.” While it definitely looks like that, one can ask, just to be sure. Communication is important; Taria – and their current situation -has made that clear to him.

“Yeah, no, it’s fine, I’m just researching if the combinations of energies can be used to… to, uh… Sorry. Sorry, you don’t want to hear this.” Khadgar lowers his head and focuses on his books again.

“No, go ahead. I… don’t understand a lot but you can tell me about it if that helps.” In an attempt to make himself more comfortable, Lothar stretches his legs out and props himself up on his elbows, determined to stay if Khadgar wants him to. They both had some time to think about the things that happened between them and maybe Khadgar is willing to talk about it now – without crying, in the best case.

“It’s alright”, Khadgar says but doesn’t look at Lothar directly. “Why are you here?”

“I wanted to see my favourite mage”, Lothar answers and cocks his head. “One of my favourite people. And I wanted to apologize for being an asshole.” There, he said it, Lothat being a dick is official. Now Khadgar does look up.

“You don’t have to”, he objects.

Lothar shakes his head. “No, I do. I’m sorry. I should’ve never hurt you.”

“You had to.” Khadgar doesn’t let him speak. “I know that I can be challenging. Sometimes I need some sort of correction to help me learn.”

“Well, I won’t be the one to administer that.” The kid has nerves, thinking of Lothar as his disciplinarian. Khadgar doesn’t know what Lothar would do to the people who actually think of punishing him in any way. “I think we should set up different rules”, Lothar suggests gently when Khadgar is quiet. “Like you and me talking about this stuff and about your… feelings. And my feelings. So we don’t mess it up again, yes?”

“Does that mean you want me to come back?”, Khadgar interrupts him. Lothar smiles. He could tell him about the salve that he got Khadgar for his sore ass, or about the extra blanket that he put on his bed for shared nights, or how he talked Taria into avoiding Khadgar until he would feel at ease around her again. But it might be a bit too much.

“It means exactly that. Come on, spell chucker, you need some rest.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, here we are!   
> I was thinking about making this into a series with even more misunderstandings (because Khadgar still has some issues.) OR I might start some BDSM/Modern-AU thingy which is also very tempting (but I know that I need people to motivate me for that if it's going to be longer than 5 chapters since I can be a slow writer...) So if any of you have headcanons for that, want to roleplay or collaborate in a fic - I'm totally here for it.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm new to the fandom (and the ship) but I love angst and writing so here we are. Comments are always appreciated.


End file.
